Cancer is not just a tumor. Cancer is the manifestation of
certain dark energies that have attached themselves to my body. This may take
the form of negative emotions, such as anger or guilt; or perhaps it’s the fear
that slithers its sly tentacles into my psyche, paralyzing me and blinding me
from the truth; or maybe it’s simply the evil energies that exist in this world
that want to keep me from radiating my light. In any case, cancer is a lack of
love. Well I got news for you, cancer. The gig is up. I am finally learning to love
myself. True love must always begin within ourselves.
The greatest part about cancer is that it has shown me the
exact places that I need to start. When we are sick, the illness manifests in
certain parts of our bodies. This is the body’s way of telling us to pay
attention to this area, for there is something to be learned and released. How
incredibly intelligent our bodies are. In my years of being sick, I have
noticed patterns. I am often attacked in my lungs and my throat, making it hard
for me to breathe, speak and sing. From this I understand that these are the
exact weaknesses that I must strengthen. So I learn to deeply breathe in every
drop of life and fully exhale all that does not serve me. I try to speak my
truths, and sing my songs, and not be concerned with what anyone else thinks. This
is how I am learning to love myself.
It has been almost a year since I was diagnosed, and to
track my progress, I had a PET scan done last week. The results were
interesting. The part of the tumor that had weaseled its way into my chest and
around my heart had retreated, leaving my chest clear. While there are still
other lymph nodes in my neck that doctors are concerned about, I have physical
evidence that the work I have done in the past year has freed my heart. How’s
that for the power of love.
I believe there are two ways to live life: In fear, or in
faith. I have chosen faith. Faith that I am on the right path, faith that I am
healing, and faith that I will overcome this darkness and go on and help other
people overcome theirs. Above all, I have faith that love always wins.
